


Awkward Goodbyes

by Munnin, yakalskovich



Series: Necessary Pebbles verse [3]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-25
Updated: 2017-01-25
Packaged: 2018-09-19 20:33:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9459392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Munnin/pseuds/Munnin, https://archiveofourown.org/users/yakalskovich/pseuds/yakalskovich
Summary: After realising they shared something deep, Galen and Bodhi are forced to part again. Under the eyes of the entire station.





	

Bodhi lingered around the ramp of the ship, making a show of cleaning a slightly grubby registration plate. In truth, he hadn't had more than a few hours sleep, unable to get Galen out of his mind. And then he'd remembered the blood from the kyber crate and had given up sleep in place of cleaning. 

The ship smelled of disinfectant, but that was better than drying blood. The new cargo helped, too, by being some exotic lumber some minor imperial dignitary had to have. Bodhi didn't know if it was for some ritual celebration, an art piece or an admiral's steam-room renovations. And he really didn't care. It had a warm, spicy scent Bodhi found stimulating.

Something about it made him think of Galen. 

Galen who he was lingering here in hope of seeing. He was loaded and had clearance but he wasn't leaving until he did, how ever briefly it might be.

Even before Galen turned up, two cleaning droids did, announcing that Galen Erso sent them to help scrub the deck, for which Bodhi was grateful. There were parts of the deck plating the cleaner droids were far better at getting to than Bodhi ever could by hand.

That done, Bodhi dismissed the droids, thanking them almost automatically and started grav-lifting the lumber segments into place. It really was a good smell, this wood. Maybe that even was what it was prized for?

Galen turned up, hurriedly, about half an hour later, walking across the windy landing pad in the same dark, ratty coat he'd thrown on last night. Bodhi was just lowering the last crate in place when Galen reached the ship. It was an effort to hide his reaction at that shy smile on the scientist’s face.

"Chief Scientist Erso, good morning." He touched his cap respectfully. "Thank you for the lend of your droids. It was... most helpful." 

He gave Galen a faintly worried look, as he looked like he’d had even less sleep than Bodhi.

Galen looked around, under the guise of inspecting the ship, a bit awkwardly like somebody who never has to be very clandestine. He actually looked as if he has had hardly any sleep at all.

"I promised I would," he said. "If my shipments leave stains on your deck..." He smiled at Bodhi, maroon eyes aglow, lack of sleep making him a tad careless.

Despite the subject and how deeply it affected him, Bodhi couldn't help but smile back shyly. Galen was incorrigible. He glanced over his shoulder, into the ship. "Could I ask you to sign the manifest so I can report the cleaning was done? Just in case it comes up as an issue?"

Fussy pilot being fussy about the paperwork after getting yelled at about a damaged crate. Nothing weird about that. Really there wasn't. "The manifest is just inside here." He gestured to the open hatch of the ship.

"Yes," Galen says. "Of course. Not a problem at all." He stepped inside, trying not to look over his shoulder before he does.

Bodhi lead him into a corner behind the cargo, in a hollow of wood scent and shadows protected from the tower above and anyone passing the open hatch. He couldn't help it. As soon as he had Galen safely out of sight, he pulled him into a passionate kiss. "Stars, Galen. I don't want to leave."

"I don't want you to leave, ever," Galen said. "I've fallen in love with you. Which you might have noticed." Because if not, why would he be kissing Bodhi back like this? Galen found this declaration less of a confession and more of a statement of the painfully obvious. "So I want to have you with me. But the Empire..."

"The Empire." Bodhi echoed, swallowing the rising lump in his throat. "Galen, I've never been in love. Never had anyone care enough to-" He choked off the words, kissing Galen again before he finished that thought. "But I love you. I love you."

"Bodhi." Galen looked into his eyes, as amazed as if the kyber crystals had suddenly started singing to him. "I thought I would never again..." He almost crushed the slight pilot in his arms.

Bodhi gave back as good as he got, hugging Galen tight. "Stars, the way you look at me." He gasped, kissing Galen desperately. "You make me want to be-" A better person. Free. Someone worth that sort of love. "Galen!"

Galen looked at him, almost amused. "I want you to be exactly as you are," he said. "You are just right like this." Scruffy, full of feeling, doe-eyed and expressive. Beautiful, beautiful Bodhi.

"I'm not brave, Galen. I'm not strong." Bodhi protested, burying his hands in Galen's hair. "If I was, I'd find a way to stay. To be with you."

"Nobody would mind," Galen said, "but I won't put you in danger." He kissed Bodhi, and sighed. "It will need work and time and courage and thought." Yes, of course they were going to be together. That was rather the point of being in love, wasn't it?

"I won't put you in danger either," Bodhi promises, returning the kiss. "We'll find a way. Somehow." He kissed again, deepening it just enough to show Galen how passionately he meant it. 

Behind him a panel beeped a warning and Bodhi swore in his native tongue. "My take-off window is coming up. I have to go. I'll find the fastest cargo back. I promise."

Galen gave the panel a frown, but nodded. "I'll see you soon," he said, "and miss you in the meantime. I detest these electronic interruptions." Chimes kept going off when they were trying to kiss or talk. It was annoying. But surely, there was time for one last gentle kiss, a memory for both of them to carry away?

Bodhi relished it, committing every breath, every sigh and brush of lips to memory. "I'm sorry. And I love you." He chuckled bitterly. "Two meals and I love you. Who knew I could fall so fast?"

"Don't doubt yourself, my lovely Bodhi," Galen murmured, leaning his face against Bodhi's hair and holding him close, as if in wistful anticipation of having to let go of him any moment now. "We fell for each other because we fit, and we both saw that right away. Sometimes, rarely enough, reality just falls into place as it should while the parts smoothly turn with each other and bring up a result bigger than the sum of its parts, at one with itself like a flower unfolding or a Force user dancing unharmed through battle. We are two people who feel deeply and personally, but also two tiny motes of stardust that recognise each other from where we already are at one, beyond time."

No-one had ever spoken to Bodhi like that before, least of all about himself. He felt his knees weaken, his eyes prick with tears. "A genius and a poet?"

The little alarm was getting louder and his radio crackered to life as the tower tried to get his attention. "Cargo Hauler NH-477, this is Eadu tower. Requesting take off ETA."

The pain in Bodhi's eyes was heartbreaking. "Galen, I love you. I'll request leave, so I can stay when I get back. At least a few days."

"Tell the tower whatever time you really need, plus ten minutes," Galen suggested. He wanted to keep Bodhi with him for ten more minutes. He could be at least that selfish with the universe. Just ten minutes. "And no, neither -- just a scientist with an idea of the inner structure of reality, of which matter, energy and time are just outward manifestations. And in that inner structure, there is a connection between us, like a shortcut through space-time. That's what we recognise in each other. On a purely personal level, it means that I love you deeply and will move the stars to keep you with me, long-term."

He closed his mouth and stepped back so Bodhi could give his ETA to the tower.

Bodhi groaned at having to let go long enough to reach the radio control. "Eadu tower, this is Cargo Hauler NH-477. Requesting twenty-five minutes delay on take off ETA. Repeat ETA plus mark 25."

The voice on the other end sounded harried and annoyed. "Eadu tower, acknowledge. Quit screwing around, Rook. I need that space."

"Acknowledge, Eadu tower. Sorry, I'll be out of your hair soon." Bodhi dumped the radio and rushed back to kiss Galen. Frantically.

"You can," Galen gasped as he desperately pulled Bodhi closer again, "blame the cleaning droids." It was an attempt at levity but fell completely flat as Galen ran his hands over Bodhi's shoulders and through his hair, kisses him and tastes him and softly bumps nose to nose, marvels at the depth of his eyes and the sweetness of his lips.The Force might need the two of them for something specific and important, but this right now was just for them. Only Galen and Bodhi. He would dare take that much.

"Stars, Galen!" Bodhi half sobbed, breathless and frantic in the kiss. Every kiss begged for another. _Don't forget me, don't let me go. Don't let me be dreaming this._ He looked at Galen as if he still wasn’t sure this was real. Or that he deserved it.

"Bodhi." Galen took the pilot's narrow face between both his warm palms and looked at him -- large, dark eyes with an almost stricken expression, long nose, soft generous lips, gently curved cheeks… Galen leaned in to kiss him again, almost reverently.

"Promise me you'll be here? When I get back?" He begged softly, his arms tight around Galen's waist. "Promise me this is real?"

"As real as the universe," Galen said. It wasn’t a promise, it was a fact.

"Galen." He buried his face in Galen's neck, breathing in the blend of Galen's scent and the warm lumber smell. "When I get back I want... I want to show you... what you mean to me."

"I already know that," Galen said. "But yes, I want that, too - lavish attention on each other, body and soul. Talk and touch, share food and drink and memories."

"I want to know you." Bodhi whispered urgently, fisting his hands in the cloth of Galen's tunic. "All of you. Everything. Everything you'll share with me."

"You will," Galen promised, running a warm hand over Bodhi's back. "I want to kiss this little hollow at the base of your skull," he added, touching the place. "And then the naked skin over your spine, all the way down, vertebra by vertebra, until I reach the soft, sensitive places where I..." He had meant it as a plain statement of intention, but while Galen was saying it, he felt his ears heat up and his throat close with emotion and desire.

"Stars, Galen! Stop!" Bodhi groaned. "I'm not going to be able to let go if you keep talking like that."

He had meant to know everything about Galen's life, his family. Share in his passions and his loss. To share heart and soul as well as body. But any ability to articulate that was rapidly flowing away from his brain, along with much of his blood.

"I will stop," Galen said. "I have to stop myself, or..." He hadn't felt this sizzling warmth since the last time he had touched Lyra. Passion and future, loss and hope -- that goes without saying, with the way they are connecting rapidly. But those sparking desires left Galen breathless and amazed. "I love you." Whispered into Bodhi's messy dark hair.

"As I love you." Bodhi whispered in return, with no less wonder. "Now kiss me and walk away while we both have the strength."

"I will see you soon," Galen said, with total conviction. The Force wanted something from them and wouldn't part them before they had done it. So he kissed Bodhi one last time, and let go.

Bodhi kissed back, passionately before stepping back. 

"Till next time, chief scientist Erso." He couldn't even try to sound formal, not as breathless and emotional as he is.

Unable.to say anything at all, Galen merely nodded.and walked away, back straight and hating every step that took him further from Bodhi.

Bodhi focused on his take off procedures, waiting till Galen is well clear before starting his ascent. 

The scientist who caused Bodhi those problems the first time happened to be coming down the cargo platform as Galen was heading back up. "Keeping a close eyes on them, sir? Very wise. Can't trust their kind. Always breaking or stealing something."

"No," Galen said, still in earshot. "Rook is good people. That much clear. We'd all starve without our cargo pilots. How is that new cluster coming on?"

Political lies only went that far for Galen Erso.


End file.
